swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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