Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
