Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
