You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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