Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Randomize
