That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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