Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
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