I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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