the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
