and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
tell me about the fingering
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