The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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