we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
