are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
