But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
