She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
