I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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