i think my tv is drunk
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
