there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
