so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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