Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
