names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
