the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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