His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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