why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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