so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
