you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
