Can i not drive my cunt home
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
