Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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