WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Randomize