how can u be prego again
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
