best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
