it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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