What a fucking waste of an outfit
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Randomize
