Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
