.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Randomize
