My room smells like vodka and shame
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
