if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
