I just saw a hot homeless man
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
