They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
