im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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