NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
How did I end up in the pool?!
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I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
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