Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
