So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Drake has all the answers
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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