I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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