how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
