Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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