I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
i think my cat just said my name.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
