how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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