I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Randomize
