I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
