your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
So vagazzling was a success
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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