She said her name was "party"
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Randomize